When Parents Collide

I'm a little annoyed with my husband right now. We just finished putting the girls to bed and I'd really like to slap him.

I read my oldest daughter a bedtime story, gave her a drink, tucked her in and rubbed her back. After a few minutes, she asked for more water and I said no. She started to whine and I could feel myself getting frustrated. Bedtime is supposed to be calm and relaxing. No tears. I don't want my angry voice to be the last thing my daughter hears before she falls asleep. So I spent the next 10 minutes getting her to calm down. I told her to take a few deep breaths. I explained calmy that I didn't want her to drink anymore because she already had a full cup of milk and a small cup of water and that if she had any more she might pee in her bed. I even rubbed her back.

Meanwhile, my husband walked upstairs and put the baby to bed. He then comes in to Big J's room to say goodnight. When she sees him, she starts crying and says that I won't let her have anymore water. He then proceeds to tell her that he'll get her another cup. Are you kidding me? I was speechless. Mostly because I didn't want to yell at him in front of her.

This is the part of parenting that frustrates me most. Hubby and I have such different styles. He's hard, I'm soft. He pushes, I encourage. He's rough, I'm gentle. How is this going to work? How can we come together and support each other?And when we do disagree, how should I handle it?