The last few days have been so stressful. Not because of shopping or holiday parties, but because my children are driving me crazy. Mostly, my 4 year-old. She is going through a phase right now, hopefully one that won't last much longer. I think it's jealousy towards the baby. Whatever it is, she has been hitting Little J. Sometimes, for no reason.
This morning she came downstairs - the baby and I were already awake - and I said good morning to her. I said good morning to her from the baby too and she walked over to her and slapped her right on the chest. Then, she starts crying and says, "I didn't want her to say good morning to me!" Are you kidding? I was so pissed. It was 7 o'clock in the morning for pete's sake. This is not how I want to start my day.
This used to be my favorite time of the year but now I feel like all I've been doing is yelling and threatening to tell Santa what a naughty girl Big J has been. I dread going out in public with the both of them because it almost always ends with me storming out of a store. Little J hates being restrained in any way so that means car seats and strollers are like torture chambers for her. If she starts crying, then Big J gets angry and that's when the fighting begins. I feel so beaten down, physically and mentally. I'm exhausted.
The grinch in me is actually dreading Christmas morning because I know it will inevitably end in tears. Here's how I imagine it. The baby will be after every single toy Big J gets and my zero patience preschooler will be screaming, "No!" all morning.
Every day feels like a battle lately. And it's not just my kids. My husband has been on my back about working so much. Yes, the very same man who basically forced me to go out and get a job.
I can't even finish this post without having to get up and break up a fight.....
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4 comments:
You just described my life and exactly how i feel. I have a 3 year old and a 9 month old. My 3 year old is a SUPER brat, most of the time. It makes me CRAZY. I too can not go anywhere with them both without wanting to rip my hair out.
Sometimes I actually DESPISE my own child. It's such a horrible feeling to be that frustrated with your child that you actually DON'T like them. I mean, i love my kiddos, but there are days when i REALLY don't like them.
Being a parent is WAY harder than i ever imagined.
Best of luck to you. Know that i will be having the same Christmas morning as you. =)
Same thing happening over here.
Too bad we can't throw them together on a playground to duke it out while we enjoy all the holiday cheer that comes in big corked bottles.
I really feel for you on this. I was the four year old with a year old sister and I hated her for years. Why? Because she took my mummy away. I can still remember how that felt after 42 years. You really need to talk to your husband about this and work together so that one or the other of you can spend a bit of quality 'one on one' time with Big J. When you do this, as well as just making her feel loved and special, you can talk about how she feels about life the universe and her sibling. I always found those Berenstein Bears books a good jumping off point for discussion with my daughter. They always have some point to them, I think there's even one on sibling rivalry. Big J is still a very little girl and she doesn't mean to be 'mean', she is just full of resentment and confusion about how she went from being so loved and important to having to share her time with you. I know you don't love her any less, but that may be her perception. Good luck with this. With a bit of preparation, planning and communication, your Christmas does not HAVE to be awful.
Dr Phil signing off :-D
Hugs and remember to breathe deeply before responding to the kids. Easier said than done, I know. :)
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