A Competimommy, that is. They've been written about all over the blogosphere lately. Mom-101 described her encounter with one in the dining room of her hotel.
"The light bulb went on over my slightly dense new mommy head. I was getting this little girl's resume disguised as chitchat. I had heard of these types of mothers but had never actually encountered one in person. (Probably because I did not have a playgroup.) I was so excited. A real live, CompetiMommy. Right here! Talking to me! If only I had had my camera on me.
The questions continued to fly: Do I take classes with my daughter? Does she know sign language? Does she take swimming? Is she good on the plane? How many words does she have? It was exhausting."
My encounter was a little different. I was at work and there was a little girl and her mom there just lingering. J is coming to work with me for the summer so she was there too. This little girl and J started coloring together. The mom felt it necessary to tell me that her darling daughter started drawing at 5 months. Because, of course, her daddy is an artist.
She went on to brag that they were heading to the library so she could pick up her daughter's award. "She's read the most books out of her playgroup." I acted impressed, but really who cares?
Then came the whopper. "Sophia, do you need to use the potty?" she asked. The girl is 2 years-old for christ's sake. J is 3 years and 1 month and she screams at the mere mention of the porcelain princess.
Needless the say we lost this round of "Whose Toddler is Smarter?" I find comfort in the fact that Sophia looked like a cabbage patch kid with diarrhea.
On a side note: Thanks so much to Adwina at InsParenting for bestowing upon me the honor of "Blog of the Week." And it was just for squealing to the world that I am again with child. And thanks to all of you guys again for your well wishes. It has meant everything to me and I can't wait to share this journey with you.
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24 comments:
Sophia? Old person's name. She will have her troubles in life. Starting with her mother.
Ooh. I didn't know those people were out there. Thanks for the warning. And yes, we're looking forward to hearing about your latest journey with your new little one!
Drawing at 5 months? That's hilarious. Does she think people are going to take her seriously??
And congrats on many accounts!
I'm actually shocked that in your line of work you don't come across more women like that. Although, competimommies can be a passive-aggressive group so its not always clear that they are tearing you and your parenting skills down, shred by shred. That woman sounds like a... well, there are no good words to describe her. I feel for her daughter, though. Poor kid.
I think I may do the competimommy thing...except it's only with one person, and it's like the opposite effect. My friend (who is 18, mind you...yeah, that's how sad my life is, 27 yr old hanging out with an 18 yr old!) has a baby that is 1 month younger than mine. So when we're together I'm like "does Brooklynn roll over yet?"
her:"oh, yeah!"
Me: Crap!(in my head of course)
a month later
Me:is brooklynn sitting up yet?
her: yes!
me: oh double crap!
her baby is younger and does everything first, and is taller and weighs more!
I know it shouldn't bother me...but I always ask the questions!!!!
Ohhh I know that feeling...
I really hate it when the entire conversation rolls around the kids...
Who cares...
What books have you read? Seen any great films? Have a minute to yourself? What did YOU do????
Great post! Glad I happened upon it!
Her daughter's getting an award for "reading" the most books? Too bad they don't have an award for who poops the biggest. My kid would TOTALLY win that one.
HATE the CompetiMommy.
Hate her.
Congrats on being preganant!
I hope you and the baby stay healthy!!
I have to parrot...drawing at 5 months?? NO WAY IN HELL! I don't care if the kid's dad is Michael Angelo or Picasso. NEVER going to happen.
As for moms like you mentioned...I can't handle them. My neighbor is one of them and honestly it's to the point anymore that we don't even talk cause I just want to say Get a life -- please.
Kids are all different and do things at different times. You didn't lose the mom competition, you won. You won because you didn't slap her silly face for bragging. Obviously she is covering for something, otherwise why all the bragging?
They all say it takes a village blah blah blah...however I believe we would be better of shipping some people to walled-in communities
Oh, I have met her and her darling brats.
One can always learn to use the toilet but looking like a cabbage patch kid with the runs? That's forever.
I know a quick way to end the competition. Just mention that you're just glad she doesn't stab other kids like her father does. I guarantee you the conversation will stop.
"cabbage patch kid with diarrhea" - I love this!
Glad you held your own (and your dignity) in this conversation. The only winner in this situation ends up being you with your graciousness.
Congrats on your award! Yeah, you!
I work with Competi-daddy and Competi-Grandma. It's the most irritating thing in the world. Competiti-daddy has to go on and on about how his son who is 2 months younger than mine is sooo much taller than my son. pfffttt...too bad he's ugly.
Competi-grandma always talks about how smart her granddaughter is and how much she talks. She's less than a week younger than my daughter. Everytime I've seen her she just stares into space. I said to Competi-Grandma "she's a real talker, isn't she? Really yakking it up."
I must be some kind of competi-magnent or something because I seem to meet these women everywhere I go. Can't they see by the look on my face that I don't give a damn about what their child did, can do, will do, won't do, do-do??
SO. COMPLETELY. ANNOYING!!
I never knew there was a name for those type of moms...I love it and hate them. Coloring at five months?! That is absolutely crazy!
I've dealt with many parents like this in my day. They are look animals, they sense fear and anxiety in other parents and seek to exploit it for their own gain. In the meantime, their kids are going to grow up to be anal retentive wrecks. Sorry, can you tell these parents drive me crazy...
I can't believe I missed this. CONGRATULATIONS!
Wow.
*guilty*
hehe I am glad we have a name for "them". I would much rather share experiences and things that work, than who is doing what first!
Oh how I remember my first encounter like it was yesterday...I too felt compelled to dedicate a post to such a creature. I referred to her as a "SUC." "Super Ultra Competitive Mom" (I dropped the "M" for effect). It sounds as if you handled the situation marvelously. Oh and Congratulations!
Someone like that just is not worth an ounce more of your time. I love the name, though..Competemom... hahahaha...I will think of that whenever I run into one of "them"...
Ha!
I have to admit, I ask a lot of questions when I meet other mommy's, but I never offer information. I'm genuinely interested in knowing what happens with children when. I usually do it to people who have older children or children much, much younger than my own. I NEVER do it to parents of children who are about the same age.
Moms like that crack me up. You just know that their kids are going to have huge complexes as teenagers.
In other news, I look forward to a few belly shots. I hope you take some.
Sure she's potty trained, sure she is . . . her mom probably just doesn't let her drink anything before they go out (which may explain her looking like a cabbage patch doll)!!!
CONGRATULATIONS on everything! How exciting, can't wait to hear more! :)
Carrie
LOL at "cabbage patch kid with diarrhea!"
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