Yesterday I was driving and saw a funny bumper sticker.
"Hang up your phone and drive asshole."
Do you know how many times I've wanted to scream that at some idiot driver who's not paying attention. But then I thought for a minute, shit sometimes that's me. Doh!
Then I wondered how many times someone has cursed me in their car. Okay so I'm swerving a little, but I've got one hand on the wheel and the other hand in the back seat fishing around for the toy my daughter dropped. So I hesitated two seconds before stepping on the gas at a green light. Don't honk your horn, I'm turned around singing "Old McDonald" to my fussy toddler. I didn't see the damn light change.
Listen, I have no patience for people when I'm on the road either so I get that you're annoyed by me, but I'm a mom, I've got a million things on my mind and a whining 3 year-old in the back seat. Maybe we need a bumper sticker for that. So here's what I came up with ...
My Kid is on the Honor Roll at Pain in the Ass Preschool
Honk if You Have Stretch Marks
My Toddler is Driving
How Well Do You Drive on 3 Hours of Sleep?
I'm a Mom, Cut Me Some Slack
Mommy and the Ferocious Beast on Board
What would your bumper sticker say?