6.14.2006

What is it About Men?

What is it about me that makes them think they ...

Rule the remote control? Hubby and I usually spend our nights in seperate rooms. Him on the computer in the playroom and me on the couch in the living room. Usually, when he's done doing whatever it is he does, he'll come and sit down with me. As soon as he plops his ass on the couch, he grabs the remote and changes the channel as if I'm invisible. WTF??

Have to one-up everything? This happens all the time. I'll make a comment about how hard my day was. "I had a crazy day at work and J was being a royal pain in the ass too. I'm beat." His response? "Oh yeah, I had a client bitch at me for an hour, then my boss had me in a meeting all afternoon and now I have to go play softball. I'm exhausted." Why is everything a competition? I'm sorry dear but working your 9 to 5 in no way compares to this 24 hour gig.

Annoy the hell out of us and it's supposed to be funny? Is your hubby anything like this? Mine thinks it's hilarious when I'm bending over to come up behind me and pretend to bang me. He also thinks it's pure comic genius to poke my boobs, squeeze my belly fat, and pinch my arms. Oh and he has to constantly remind me of how much sex he's NOT getting. Little digs directed my way. Is that supposed to put me in the mood?


What is it about your man that irks you??

21 comments:

Juliabohemian said...

I know this sounds strange but, that is how men relate socially. I saw a whole program on it in one of my classes at school.

Boys relate to one another by competing. For instance, one will say "We have 2 dogs" and the other will say "oh, we have three dogs" (even if it isn't true). The boys will continue in this conversation and walk away satisfied.

Girls relate to each other through disclosure and commonality. One will say "I like purple. It's my favorite color." and another will say "It's my favorite color too." (even if it isn't true) She wants to understand the other girl and have something in common with her.

Both of these serve the same purpose for each gender, a feeling of connectedness. But, when a boy tries his technique on a girl or vice versa, signals get crossed and feelings hurt.

When your husband becomes verbally competitive, he may just be trying to relate to you socially. It's his way of finding commonality.

Karla said...

Wait a second...were you at my house last night???? We had an arguement about the remote, because we were watching something that we both wanted to watch yet I couldn't even HOLD the remote. It was making him nuts.

Then my breasts are a little sore due to the monthly visitor coming soon and he had to constantly poke and poke and poke until I totally snapped. Why would I like this???

Mrs. Chicky said...

I don't know a man who doesn't try to one up someone at every turn. But I have to agree with juliabohemian, I think its how they try to relate.

Its sad, really. But that's how the boys are.

Mama of 2 said...

There is a reason there's a book called Men are from Venus, Women are from Mars.

We just are from totally different planets and relate on completely different levels.

The remote must be an issue in all households. My biggest problem is while we are watching one thing hubby will insist on changing channels during the commericals and we always I mean ALWAYS miss a part of the show we were supposed to be watching together. It drives me insane.

The only other thing that completely annoys me is that you would think that after 14 years together he would know what annoys me and stop doing it...but NOPE he continues doing it just the same.

Men -- can't live with them and can't kill them either. LOL!

SugarMama said...

My 2 boys (6 and 3) are both remote huggers already, and they are really just allowed 30 minutes of tv a day. I don't know how that happened. Yesterday when we came home in the afternoon, My husband and 3 boys ran for the remote before anyone can even sit down. hehe

Cityslicker Mom said...

Hmm. sometimes he can be really, really delusional.

Her Bad Mother said...

He loves to tease, but CANNOT take it when I dish it back.

And, he's a bit of a slob. Does cleaning binges, but leaves his underwear on the floor.

The Flip Flop Mamma! said...

Umm...everything you said in the last paragraph is exactly what I go through everyday! My hub is a youth pastor, and still acts like that! It's hardwired in their brains!

It's okay, Sweetie said...

You know? I think you hit the nail on the head. Maybe men are given the same handbook up at the wedding alter.

I'm gonna make my husband READ this. And I'm gonna stand behind him, pretending to bang him and say, "See? You See?"

the weirdgirl said...

Oh yeah, ALL of these! Plus, the inability to learn (over YEARS) what annoys us. PLUS, the being cranky and picking a stupid fight at home even though they're really pissed off at someone at work. I think it's called transference. SO ANNOYING!

carrie said...

Are we all married to the same man (read: pubescent male)? I am beginning to loose hope for the future, and gropeless days, and watching what I want on tv...I need some chocolate!

Carrie

Nicole said...

My husband and I plan the one-up game all the time. I have to admit I'm just as guilty as he is at this one. The annoying thing is REALLY annoying. It's like their teenagers and just don't know when to stop. I don't understand why they have to flip th channels constantly during the commercials. Would it be so bad to talk to us during that time?

chelle said...

My husband ALWAYS has to one up me. We have had arguments about it, because it has started to affect how I feel about myself. He always has to be right and always has something to add.

I am glad I am not alone with this! He never used to do it!!!

Jamie said...

My husband also loves to do the overgrabby, pretend to sneak up and bang me type action in the kitchen. Yes, because seeing me bend over the dishwasher is SO DARN SEXY.

bubandpie said...

This is a dangerous question to ask! For me, it's the underwear on the floor thing, every time.

There's a great book on male and female communication styles, You Just Don't Understand. The author tries really hard to describe things neutrally, but I kept throwing the book down and yelling, "Why does everything have to be a competition all the time!" So it's not just a stererotype - there's scientific evidence backing us up.

JayMonster said...

mama of 2 is so right about the mars/venus thing.

We don't have a "remote problem" because I can't tell you the last time our television has been on something other than the Disney Channel.

The whole grabby - uh... bang from behind thing. Just understand something about men (in general and this is an oversimplification which of course does not apply in all cases.End Disclaimer), we are not the best at expressing the "little things" particularly out of context. As stupid to you as it sounds, the man who grabs you from behind while you are bent over something, it simply trying to let you know how attractive that you are to him. Does he expect you to get all hot and bothered about it? No, not really. Just to understand that he "likes you like that" (so to speak).

Petite Mom Blogger said...

LOL! This is so true! And from reading the other comments, it's seems that none of us are alone. Men are just like that. But what bothers me is that now on some tv shows, you see doctors (men, of course) defending this type of action in favor of men and just saying that it's ok because that is how they are wired.

sassy said...

OMG I am simply ROLLING from your third description...it is soooo true!

I asked him once why he found it so amusing it irriate me like that when he knows I can't stand it.

His response?

He didn't realize it irriated me...he thought he was doing an outstanding job of "foreplay".

Are you freaking kidding me?!?!

Kristen said...

Is my boyfriend living with you too? LOL. He does all of those things to me and it makes me want to kill him lol. Oh, add on "mouth noises" at night. Grrr.

Oh and off the subject of things that he does- for some reason I cannot stand how these words sound: Moist, Tasty, Treat, Panties. I HATE the word PANTIES worst of all. They're underwear or thongs. Not panties. It sounds so pervy.

Petite Mom Blogger said...

Just thought I'd let you know that I posted a link to this post from my site. :)

Christy said...

Your post is absolutely HILARIOUS! No way around it!!! I get the "bend over bang" too. Hate it.

Ok, my vent. He works. I stay at home with the 3 month old. He plays soccer on Friday nights and generally goes out "with the guys" afterwards, typically not returning home until about...ah, 1am-ish. He says he needs to unwind, so he'll have a few beers, whatever. But when he comes home smelling like a beer factory and I'm sleeping. He seems to find it the BEST time to want to cuddle or hog the covers. REALLY REALLY Irritates me. And normally he'll wake up the kiddo which means, I'M STUCK GETTING HIM BACK TO SLEEP since I've got the boobs! OK...I just want to smack him sometimes for being annoying!